Kicking the Bucket List

The term “bucket list” after the 2007 movie of the same name became a popular anthem for people of a certain age (like myself) who want to squeeze in as many experiences as possible while time is still on our side.   Although I understand this desire, the idea of life as a checklist has become somewhat unappealing to me.   I kept my view to myself mostly because I didn’t want to pass judgement on what other people view as an important way to gauge whether they are living their dreams to the fullest.   One day, I was walking with a friend and she commented that she detested the term “bucket list”.    I found a kindred spirit!

We recently took a much anticipated trip to Buenos Aires and Patagonia this January.   We used a friend’s itinerary to plan our trip since we had never been to South America, and didn’t realize how vast the region was.   One of our friends who traveled to Latin American for work for many years scanned the itinerary and said, “I’m tired already.”   Although I originally had the impulse to squeeze in as many of those iconic “bucket list” sites as possible, I realized that might not be the most pleasant way to travel.   We sure would be checking all those boxes but also have an exhausting travel schedule and perhaps wouldn’t be able to savor any of them fully.   We went back to our friends who took this trip previously and asked for the top 2 or 3 highlights.  In the end, we spent a few days in Buenos Aires, explored some glaciers near Tierra del Fuego  and did some hiking in Torres del Paine National Park in Chile.   At the lodge, we chose a variety of hikes of different lengths, not always the longest or most challenging, but those which gave us different views and experiences in the park.

I also realized that when it comes to experiences in general, I don’t want or need to fill every night of the week or even every weekend with special events and social engagements.  I’m okay with less is more.   I want to savor,  appreciate and value every experience that comes my way.   I want to, dare I say, simplify, but not minimize my expectations.    As I transition from the go-go years of child-rearing  and middle age to this next phase of life, I am using this time to reflect on what is really important and how I want to spend my time now and in the future without listing my life away. I need to reserve both physical and emotional space in my life to allow spontaneity.  With no space, there is no time for embracing the unexpected, and I want to allow my life to experience that occasional element of surprise that makes life more interesting and meaningful.   And instead of “bucket listing”, I want to explore and blend the edges of my days. I want to take things in, let things go, and let the story of my life be its own journey.